I'm Hamm, the local bank and resident numismatist. For
you uneducated types, that's a collector of money. I myself am an educated
type. I attended Shoat, the prestigious prep school, then matriculated
to Bacon State, a highly regarded school in the Pig Pen.
I'm thrifty, clean -- especially for a member of the swine family --
and a little bit of a know-it-all since I can see everything that's
going on from my top-shelf vantage point in Andy's room. I would have
to say that I'm the only toy in the room who actually looks forward
to birthdays and holidays. Cha-ching!
When I first arrived in Andy's room a couple of years ago, as a gift
from his Uncle Bob and Aunt Fern, I didn't have a nickel to my name.
I have since been steadily saving, however, and now have a belly full
of change. Also three paper clips, two buttons, a Lego flag, the ship
from a Monopoly game, the missing gun from Woody's holster, a token
from Pizza Planet, and a couple of Golden Dread Head pogs.
My favorite coin is the Susan B. Anthony dollar, not to be confused
with the Canadian quarter. Yes sir, the Susan B. is OK by me. That
baby has some heft to it, and resonates beautifully against my insides.
I'm also partial to British coinage. A halfpenny is the perfect light
snack before bedtime. Cha-ching!
Just between you and me ... I have a cork in my stomach. It is not
considered polite to mention this with children present.
'Hamm'ing It Up
"What's goin' on down there -- is his mom losin' her marbles?"
"Yes sir, we're next month's garage sale fodder for
"Way to go, Idaho!"
Hamm's voice belongs to John